TWILA MSTd
by PeculiarTalent
Summary: Violet "Violent" Hollow, Felix Gold, and Harriet Houdini MST this crapfic.


hay guyz my nami is Twila Beautiful PSyco Topaz Cullem.

**Violet: What the TARDIS are your parents on?**

**Felix: I second that.**

**Harriet: Probably dope.**

i go 2 skewl in waschington wif da SEXIIEST VAMPYRE EVER,

**Violet: Vampires aren't real—**

**Felix: Three words. Vlad. The. Impaler.**

**Violet: *snarls***

**Felix: I'll shut up now.**

hiz name iz edward Cullen

**Harriet: Not real.**

**Felix: We're not real.**

**Harriet: But Talent didn't make us sparkly vampires. She made me the daughter of Houdini, cuz she had a screwed up dream about that, she made you a factoid nerd, , and Violet a crazy violent Whovian. You two are at least realistic.**

n he iz sooo sexii n hot n gerad way mite play him in da movi TWILITE!1

**Violet: (fake valley girl voice) LIKE OMIRASSILION TOTALLY!**

omfg i wuld hav an organism lololbut neway dis iz mi stori its called XXX TWILA, THE GURL WHO WAS IN LUV WIF A VAMPIR XXX'

**Violet: Twila…**

**Felix: 'da gurl'…**

**Harriet: who was in 'luv'**

**Violet: wif?**

**Felix: a vamp-rrr. Seems legit.**

ok btw im gothik n so is edword so we wer ment to b ok!

**Felix: To semi-quote MAD…..you sound like a creepy Kardashian!**

so haterz bak off n if u lyk bella den fuk U!

ok thanx 2 my editar, Midnite Cullen (dnt get ne ideaz shez not marred 2 ed, she iz maried 2 jasper)

**Harriet: Because I totally thought she was married to Eddiekinz.**

plz plz plz giv me reviews plz i wuld lyk dat, this is da 1st time i eva rote a stori, btw my infleuence is enoby darkness dementia ravn way! i fink she iz da best OK ENJOY GUYZ

**Felix: I can already feel my IQ lowering. Talent, do I hafta do this?**

**Talent: Yes. *evil laugh* This is why I made you! After all, you guys are my split personalities. Not Harriet, though. She's from this screwed up dream.**

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx TWILA, DA GIRL WHO WAS IN LUV W/ A VAMPIRxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 

CHAPTER 1

Hi my name is Twila Beatiful Psyco Topaz

**Harriet: When I say self, you say insert! SELF!**

**Everyone else: INSERT!**

(not cullen yet, bcuz i ddnt meet edward yet)

**Felix: To quote Sheldon Cooper…Spoiler Alert!**

n i live in waschington wif my sister Midnite.

**Harriet: When I say editor, you say insert! EDITOR!**

**Everyone else: INSERT!**

we liv in a dark house that iz far away from every1 els n we r vampires.

**Violet: That's nice, dear, now do the dishes.**

we feest on blood n no1 else noes dat we are vampirs. not evn are mom wich is y we moved away to b by ourselves.

**Harriet: I don't even know my mom! All I know is my dad is Harry Houdini. I'd give anything to see my mom. So shut up.**

yes we r LONERS.

**Felix: Not really. If you were, you wouldn't even live with your sister.**

i go 2 a hi school n every1 finks dat im really hott,

**Harriet: I'm sure. I've been told I'm fairly cute, but not 'hott.'**

i hav strait blak hair nd topez eyes

**Violet: I have curly red hair and TARDIS blue eyes.**

**Felix: I have messy black hair and sea green eyes.**

**Harriet: I have curly black hair and steel grey eyes.**

n mi sister midnte is da same

**Felix: Support cloning. It could be awesome.**

accept she has magenta eyez.

**Harriet: No! I'll never accept your sister's magenta eyes!**

**Violet: I will, if you accept I have TARDIS blue eyes.**

i wear lots of blak makup on mi eyes even tho i hav dark ciircles under my eyes

**Violet (as Twila) I kall it slepless sheek.**

, (a/n ok if u think thats lame then FUK U,

**Felix: No, thanks. I'm good.**

edword has dem too and steraphie myers sed hes realli hot ok.)

**Everyone: MEYER HAS NO TALENT.**

i dnt lyk any1 at mi school, i am a missenthrop (a/n loook it up) that menz i hate other ppl

**Felix: I hate everyone too, except for Harriet—**

**Harriet: *smiles stupidly and blushes***

**Felix: -and Violent. VIOLET! OMIGOD, I MEANT VIOLET!**

**Violet: *punches Felix in the shoulder***

accept midnite.

**Harriet: Didn't I already say I wouldn't?**

one day i met a realli sexi vampore named EDWARd CULLENS

**Felix: She said…vampore. *rolls in the floor laughing***

he haz realli white skin lyk me. he is satan's gift to dis planet

**Talent: Pardon me, but I would like to take this time to mention that the stupidest AN in the world is coming. **

(a/n I DONT BELEVE IN GOD I AM N ATHEIST. i thnk saten created dis universe god bles u satan u r alwayz in mi heart.)

**Violet: No…**

**Felix: Friggen…**

**Harriet: Words.**

so anywey i met him i nda skewl n he was wif some fukking ugli ass bytch named bella swann. she waz soo stupid n she kept fallin out of her seat.

**Harriet: Is she having a seizure?**

edwward lookd at me lyk wtf is dis gurl doing.

**Harriet: Having a seizure. I already said that.**

i smiled at him sexi and aventerous n he new rite away that i wuz a vampir, i culd tell from his eyes wich were da same collor as mine.

**Felix: Illogical.**

"Heyy" he sed walkn away from bella. dere were some gay ass ghetto ppl in his way doin da SOLDA BOY CRANK DANce n he jus lookd at dem with his dethly eyes n they iran away. i realy hat cliks n gheto ppl fink they r kewl, i giv dem the middle finger in the halwayz n itz l;ke YEA HUS TUFF NOW LOL rite

**Violet: Wrong.**

neway edward n i sat 2getha at da lunch tabel n bella stard at us wif dat poser jakob.

**Felix: Even I know that Jacob goes to school on the rez.**

**Violet: Maybe. But this is Jakob.**

**Felix: Point.**

ed ddnt pay ne atencion to her at all.

**Harriet: Alright, everybody, say it with me now…**

**Everyone: OOC!**

he told me al abot how he iz a vampir n his dad carlose wnated 2 meet me.

**Violet: But…but…but…**

n his sisters alice, rosmarie, jasper n emet all luved me rite away n his mom esmi wnted 2 meet me 2.

**Harriet: When I say Mary, you say Sue! MARY!**

**Everyone else: SUE!**

so we kut skewl early n went to his realli big house in da woods n jasper is realli big and muscelar so he jst nocked down all da treez in da way.

**Felix: You jerk. Those trees have oxygen. Do you want to breathe, Twila? DO YOU WANT TO BREATHE?**

when we got there carlose came to da door imedately. he gasped in surpise at my beauty

**Harriet: Or your unrealisticness. **

"You Must be twila, my u certenly r attraxive" he teasd me seductevly. ed, jasp, emet, alison n rosaline all growld at him angrly, all sensitive becuz they liked me 2 besidez it wusnt fare cuz he was alreadi married.

**Violet: Yup. That'll stop him.**

"Yea thats me lol" i told him and bowed (a/n dats wat they do in japanese becuz its polite)

**Felix: Are we in Japan? No. Stahp.**

"nice to met you i said.

"So i hear ur a vampir, cum in my house n we can talk about it."

**Everyone: CUM?!**

I waz sooo excited n i ran in quikly in every1 followed me, we were alreadi frends.

**Harriet: In Talent's twisted dream, everyone hated me D:**

XXXXXXXXXX END OF CHAPTE 1XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

PLZ GUYZ TELL ME IF ITS GUD

**Everyone: LOLNOPE**

**Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy yyyyy333yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy yyy**

**So. Violet, Felix, and Harriet. Somewhat of a motley crew.**

**I no own MAD. Or The Big Bang Theory. Or Doctor Who. Or Twilight. (Thank the Creator) Or this fanfic. (Double thanks.)**

**The screwed up dream I had. I'll tell you at the end of the story. MWA HA HA!**

**Kisses!**

**-A**


End file.
